I tell ya what I don't need

to have some kid correcting me again and being right
to be filling out a Lavender sheet for anybody
to eat breakfast
to give a care
to be on top of things
to set a good example
to know what I am talking about
to give 110%
to drive to Target
to watch the road
to know when I am going to know when I am going to want to have a baby
to match my clothes
to have a migraine
to tip the Starbucks kid
to diet
to listen to certain people who talk lots and say nothing
to compromise my priorities
to be fair all the time
to know everything I can
to use punctuation
Unless I want to.

Parent-Teacher Staredown

Yes, hello, how are you, good to meet you, shake hands, sit down.
Smile, even if you don't like their kid
Even if you're tired
Or have a headache
Or have better things to do
Smile
Keep smiling
Fake it if you have to
And you definitely have to most of the time
Make small talk
Of course you're no good at it
Just do it anyway
That's what the mommies and daddies pay for
Do they hate this as much as we do
They should.

The kids you like the best
You have nothing to say about
How many synonyms can there be for "fine"
You use them all and then some
The ones you have something to say about
The ones with "room to grow"
Shooting themselves in the foot in every class
Are never the kids you like the best
Their parents are the ones about whom you say
"Oh, now I get it
That's their problem."
And you smile
Smile because you have to
Smile
Because vacation begins on Saturday at 3

Eutrophication

Too much of a good thing can kill you
Assuming too much and hoping for the best,
Only to watch half the population go belly-up
They seemed to get it
When they nodded their heads and we moved on
Only to find out photosynthesis doesn't happen overnight.

Mountain Day

A darn good reason to make yourself hurt
Getting to the top
And who cares if you're the first or last
Or have the right clothes
If you're fat and out of shape, it's almost better
Because when you get to the bottom you know it
And your aching legs remind you where you've been
For days